Alcoholism in Relationships

"Alcoholic" is one of those words that raises high emotions. We tend to think of an alcoholic as someone who is violent, dangerous, and self destructive. We may also visualize an alcoholic as being selfish and not caring about anyone but themself. Sometimes those stereotypes are appropriate, but often they aren't.
By definition, and alcoholic is someone addicted to consuming alcohol, but how they behave when intoxicated, and the extent of their addiction vary widely. In addition, the word alcoholic is often used as a condemnation of someone who drinks more than their spouse would prefer.
So when can a loving spouse reasonably remain with an alcoholic, and when is it time to leave?
With one huge difference, the criteria for deciding the future of your relationship are the same whether your spouse is alcoholic or not:
1. If your spouse is physically violent or threatens physical violence, you must leave now - today. This is true whether your partner is drinking or just angry. It doesn't matter if they promise they will never hurt you again. It doesn't even matter if they promise to get help for their addiction. Violence or threats are cause to leave right now and seek safety.
2. If you feel safe and you are happy in your relationship, you have no cause to leave. Even if your spouse drinks too much for their own good, and even if they are unwilling to address their addiction, accept them as they are, love them, and don't pester them with demands to change their behavior. Of course you stand ready to support a decision on their part to get help in defeating their addiction, but you can't live their life for them.
3. If you are seriously unhappy because of any aspect of your relationship, consider leaving your partner. Whether the cause of your suffering is your spouse's addiction, philandering, angry outbursts, demeaning attitude toward you, or any other cause, it is your responsibility to take care of yourself.
The one exception to the general rule of maximizing your own well-being occurs when your partner makes a voluntary commitment to treatment for addiction and continuously follows up on that commitment. As long as you feel safe and you continue to see commitment and improvement, hold on. If your partner's progress turns to frequent backsliding, end the battle and take care of yourself by getting out of the relationship if you are suffering.
If children are involved in your decision, understand that their best interest is not well served by living with an addictive or hostile parent.

Read Don't Stay in a Broken Marriage For the Children
Read Jonathan's Daily Insight & Quote.
Jonathan Lockwood Huie is an author of self-awareness books, including Simply An Inspired Life: Consciously Choosing Unbounded Happiness in Good Times & Bad. He has been dubbed "The Philosopher of Happiness" by those closest to him, in recognition of his on-going commitment to seeing Joy in all of life.
** Today is your day to dance lightly with life. It really is. - Jonathan Lockwood Huie **

Different Types Of Depression- 6 Common Types

According to common categorization, there are six different types of depression, which range from relatively mild to severe. Following is a description of each of them.
1. Major (or clinical) depression
This type of depression is what many people normally know about. This is the classic depression or what is often referred to as clinical depression.
Psychiatrists define major or clinical depression as that type of depression that dwells on the gloomy end of the spectrum, thus it is likewise referred to as "unipolar depression." A person with this type of depression gets sad thoughts, unable to control it, stays with being sad for a long period of time and is most likely to hate himself rather than other people for being the way he is.
A person with this type of depression needs utmost supervision. He is very likely to inflict harm to himself. Which is why, with clinical depression, a person must be treated with medications. This is to prevent suicide from happening whenever he falls into self-hate and loathing which is very common to this type of depression.
2. Dysthymia or Chronic Depression
The second of the 6 different types of depression is dysthymia more known to many as chronic depression.
With this type of depression, a person usually experiences depression symptoms way milder than that of major depression. However, if a person with major depressive episodes experiences the major blues for weeks or months, a person with chronic depression, on the other hand, feels the blues (although mild) day in and day out for a minimum of two years.
The feeling of hopelessness, sadness, insomnia and having eating disorders are experienced for a long time, as though having those feelings is just part of the daily life, or that sadness is the regular menu of the day. People falling under this type of depression sometimes fall into major depression.
A person with dysthymia or chronic depression requires treatment so as to give the person a chance to live a normal life during his depressed state.
3. Bipolar Depression
If there is unipolar depression there is also bipolar depression. This condition is characterized by mood swings - someone might be extremely happy one moment and then go into a melancholic state within a short period of time. These states are also referred to as "mania" and "hypomania", the two opposite poles in mental state - thus the term "bipolar".
4. Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)
There are people who get depressed during fall or winter - they have what psychiatrists call seasonal effective disorder (SAD). Whenever a certain season hits, they fall into depressed state, their hormones change and they can't function well, just like a person in a major depression. What's different with people with SAD is that when the depression season ends, they get well and function normally again.
Stressors for SAD are not limited to changes in climate. It includes celebrations such as a birthday (his or of someone close to him), Valentine's Day, Christmas or New Year's eve.
5. Atypical Depression
This type of depression makes someone difficult to live with. The sufferer may become hypersensitive emotionally, go into panic attacks, overeat and oversleep. This may prevent him or her from forming a lasting romantic relationship because the symptoms may drive the other person "nuts". This type of depression is mild and can easily be cured compared to other types.
6. Psychotic Depression
Of all the different types of depression, psychotic depression is the most severe type. With this type of depression a person experiences hallucinations, hears voices and gets delusional. If a person with mild or major type of depression goes untreated, he or she may suffer from a psychotic breakdown.

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How To Deal With Anxiety While Driving

Millions of people are suffering from panic disorder and some form of panic disorder comes out while driving a car or any vehicle. It makes some people stop driving and let someone else drive for them. But not everyone can afford to hire a driver or have someone to drive them around, there are cases that you need to drive and if you have an anxiety disorder, you have to learn how to deal with anxiety while driving.
Anxiety while driving is some kind of situational anxiety. People with anxiety disorder have intense fear about irrational things. Some have fear of riding elevators, fear of enclosed or dead end area and in your case anxiety strikes while driving. Anxiety disorder is accompanied by symptoms like sweating, trembling, feeling of choking, dizziness and pounding heartbeat. You have to learn to deal with anxiety while driving and control your fears.
An anxiety attack occurs when you are pressured while driving and it is like you are going to pass out. There are different fears ranging from crossing bridges, being trapped in traffic, vehicular accident or maybe as simple as being trapped inside the vehicle alone. Anxiety is a common emotion and helpful to keep you on your toes in the face of danger, but if this emotion becomes a liability and prevents you from functioning normally, then it is a disorder. You have to do something to deal with anxiety while driving and here are some tips:
Take your anxiousness as a positive thing and think that you are a capable driver. Of course it is better to be calm with no anxiousness at all but if you have anxiety, always think that it is not bad to be anxious and you can control your emotions. Actually, anxious drivers are not dangerous in the road because they are more careful and have a high level of alertness than ordinary drivers. If you have good driving history, the best way to deal with anxiety while driving is to always think that you are a capable driver. Reaffirm to yourself that you are a good driver and nothing bad is about to happen.
Do not pressure yourself. Panic drivers have anxiety attacks when pressured while driving. Learn to handle stress and as much as possible find a place that is not over populated so that you can pull over and relax if you want to. Avoiding stressful situations is another way to deal with anxiety while driving.
Condition your mind that there is always an exit and you are not trapped. Sometimes anxiety attacks when you are trapped alone in your car or trapped in traffic without someone with you to help you. Condition your mind that there is always an exit or escape and you are not trapped. You do not need assistance, you can do it alone and the traffic will always move. Conditioning your mind and rejecting intrusive thoughts is one good way to deal with anxiety while driving.

The freedom to drive around without unnecessary fear is an enjoyable experience that is why you need to learn to deal with anxiety while driving and control its disabling symptoms. Anxiousness should not stop you from driving and enjoying life. To get rid of anxiety disorder naturally visit Panic Away
To know more about natural remedies visit Great Discovery-Health and Beauty
Gerry Restrivera writes informative articles on various subjects including How to Deal with Anxiety While Driving. You are allowed to publish this article in its entirety provided that author's name, bio and website links must remain intact and included with every reproduction.

Why Is It Important To Be Physically And Mentally Healthy?

Why is it important to be physically and mentally healthy? Why should people bother with exercising, dieting and making sure that both their bodies and their minds are in their most ideal states? There are many benefits to being healthy, and there are many reasons why people choose to ignore them. However, some facts are just too true and too serious to ignore.
Why Should You Be Physically Healthy?
• Reduce risks of diseases. There's no way this could be denied. People who are healthy have better chances of fighting off cardiovascular diseases, diabetes and, as some researchers suggest, even cancers. Numerous studies have found the link between physical activity and lowered risks for diseases to be quite strong. This is probably the best benefit that good health can provide.
• Weight control. Being healthy means that you might have better control when it comes to how much you weigh. Healthy people are, most of the times, disciplined people who have learned to say no to heaping second servings and to say yes to exercises even if it takes them hours. All of these and more are why is it important to be physically and mentally healthy.
• Improves balance and widens range of activities. As you age, you may feel that you are being limited about the things that you can do. The things that you might have done for hours when you were young, you may not even bear to do for a minute. Daily activities might tire you right away. Exercises and many other physical activities can not only help strengthen your muscles and bones, but can also improve balance and prevent falls.
Why Should You Be Mentally Healthy?
• Reduces stress. Stress, in moderated amounts, can be beneficial to health. Stress can give you energy, and makes you productive and more alert. However, stress in excess can be severely damaging. It can increase the risks of certain cardiovascular diseases, and can get in the way of the body's natural rate of metabolism, thus leading to weight gain. Stress has also been linked to absenteeism and accidents in the workplace. If it can be effectively managed, your chance of getting promoted also increases.
• Improves mood and overall quality of life. Too much anger, confusion, fear, irritability and anxiety may be signs of mental unhealthiness. Happiness may be more easily attained if a person is mentally healthy. People who are mentally healthy will have healthier relationships, and have better physical health. They can also manage their problems better and can make better life choices.
Conclusion
Why is it important to be physically and mentally healthy? It is important because it can give you a longer and more fruitful life. If you get all these benefits from being physically active, how much more can it help if you are mentally active as well? Mental health and physical health are undeniably interlinked. Physical activities help manage stress and pressure better, while mental health improves the effectiveness of physical activities.

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Effects Of Nutrition On Mental Health

It has been an enduring belief that nutrition plays a significant role in the state of mental health of an individual. But is this true or not?
Recent as well as previous researches have proven that nutrition (or the lack of it) does have effects on how a person's brain functions, his moods and his behaviors.
Say for example, a person who has skipped a meal is observably weak, out of focus and irritable. This case worsens when extended to a certain period of time when the person becomes severely moody and indifferent to the demands of his environment thus showing decreased speed in reaction time.
These behaviors occur due to the lack of nutrition supply to the brain. The brain requires high energy and nutrient supply. It comprises, in fact, 20% to 30% of all the energy consumption of the body during rest periods. Thus, any change in diet or nutrition level of the body directly reflects in the mental functioning.
Chronic energy deprivation, such as the case of malnourished people, results to the eventual shutting down of the body by decreasing its activities and redirecting all its energy sources towards the systems that require higher energy supply. This results to altered levels of activities, changes in hormonal levels, lessened immune system efficiency and transport of nutrients and oxygen to certain body parts, all of which could directly or indirectly influence mental health. People with extremely low nutrition are more likely to become sad, depressed and emotional as compared with those who have adequate nutrition.
Newborn babies and fetuses are also susceptible to brain damage if they are subjected to lack of necessary nutrition. The type and degree of damage is dependent on the severity of malnutrition. Also, malnutrition among babies has proven to produce low level of intelligence, cognitive defects as well as functional abnormalities.
Protein, carbohydrates, lipids and vitamins all have individual effects on the brain. Lack of supply of these necessary nutrients result to alterations in the activities of the neurotransmitters, a chemical component in the brain that transmit one nerve impulse from one nerve cell to another. Malfunctioning of the transmitters could influence a person's mood, thinking and even sleep patterns. Additionally, deficient levels of nutrition may result to nerve cell damage that could disrupt cognitive and mental functions.
Neurotransmitters are partly made of amino acids, the building block of protein. Trytophan for example, makes up the neurotransmitter serotonin. If the required amino acid is lacking, the functions of the neurotransmitter could not be executed affecting the normal functioning of the brain. In case of deficient protein consumption and failure to supply the necessary amino acid to make serotonin, the body would experience low mood and perhaps, aggression. On the other hand, diseases that could cause the build up of certain amino acids could lead to brain damage thus affecting the mental health of an individual.
Mood regulation could also be associated with the sufficient intake of dietary fats. Some studies have yielded inconclusive results on the correlation between serotonin level and intake of omega-3 fatty acids, a certain type of fat found only in white fish to stress and symptoms of bipolar disorder (a mood disorder having the representations of both mania and depression).
Directly or indirectly, nutrition has an effect on mental health. Changes in the nutritional intake of a person could lead to alterations in the mental health and vice versa.

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Anxiety and Panic Attacks

For people that experience anxiety and panic attacks on a regular basis, it's not uncommon for these issues to go untreated for various reasons. Panic attack and anxiety sufferers may be so embarrassed, paranoid, and fearful that others may think they are "crazy" that they just do everything in their power to avoid situations that cause them to become anxious. Over time, many of these people start to lose hope that they will ever stop feeling anxious, and they may lock themselves away from the life and others that they once enjoyed, a mental disorder that's referred to as agoraphobia. When this happens, there can be some serious long-term consequences that the anxiety sufferer will end up with.
Psychological Concerns
Many of the results of untreated anxiety and panic attacks cannot only be devastating psychologically; they can be life threatening as well. A person who continually experiences the physical symptoms of anxiety, such as heart palpitations, stomach and digestive ailments or insomnia, can become physically ill as a result. The anxiety sufferer may become home bound out of fear of having a panic attack in front of peers at a job or in public. The person may decide to avoid the things that cause anxiety, such as driving or performing routine life activities like grocery shopping or spending time with friends and family. Worse yet, the anxiety sufferer may stop getting regular medical care for existing health issues they may have out of fear of being labeled as unstable.
Physical Concerns
In addition, anxiety can cause other health problems to become worrisome or increase in occurrence. In fact, the health problems may be at the root of their worrisome tendency - it's a vicious cycle that has no end. For example, a person who is anxious about their stomach pains may go on to develop ulcers, which are life threatening. The more they worry about dying from their stomach pain, the worse their physical condition becomes. Or the person may become so depressed from not wanting to leave the house may be so worried that they develop social phobias and then even suicidal tendencies.
Anxiety left untreated over time can cause high blood pressure, which can lead to premature heart failure. Anxiety can cause hormonal imbalances in both men and women, which is detrimental to health and well-being. This hormonal imbalance can contribute to thyroid function issues, diabetes, immune deficiencies, and other illnesses that can cause serious consequences. More often than not, people become anxious due to a seemingly small issue, but because they worry so much and can't control the anxiety, the build-up of endorphins causes their body to work overtime. This causes strain on the body as a whole.
Left untreated, anxiety is also a leading cause of obesity. People often eat out of emotional needs and stress. Being tense as a result of having anxiety is one reason that people may overeat and don't get enough exercise. Then the heavier that a person gets, the harder it is to leave the house to exercise, and the worse the anxiety symptoms become. The irony is that exercise has been shown to improve the symptoms of anxiety, and so it's actually beneficial for a person who has anxiety to exercise on a regular basis. Yet, without proper care from a health care professional, many fail to realize they need this regular exercise in order to combat their anxiety.
There are ways that the effects of anxiety can be reduced and in many cases eliminated. Living a healthy lifestyle that includes regular medical care, whole foods that are high in vitamins and nutrients, supplementing with natural products, and a good balance of exercise and rest is the best treatment for anyone experiencing anxiety.

Untreated anxiety can create devastating psychological and physical symptoms. The very fear of having an anxiety attack can prevent a sufferer from seeking natural treatments for anxiety.

What is Good Mental Health?

What is good mental health? We are all more or less mentally healthy, and this usually varies through our lives especially as we deal with difficult life events, change and so on. Whether we call this psychological wellbeing, happiness, contentment, positive mindset, all these terms relate to good mental health.
With our physical health, it's part of our everyday discourse to be aspirational. We want to feel physically fit, energetic, strong, balanced in our weight, eating a healthy diet, supple, resilient and not prone to minor ailments. Sure we complain about our problems, and talk about how we can't do all the things we know we ought to do. We know it's not easy to stay physically healthy without working at it, especially if we've experienced health problems. We know that even if we reach the peak of physical fitness, we can't maintain this for the rest of our lives without paying attention to it.
Research tells us that good mental health is even more beneficial than good physical health. A positive mental outlook increases the rate and speed of recovery from serious, even life threatening, illness. Psychological resilience and wellbeing gives people the strength to turn problems into challenges into triumphs.
Yet whenever I ask a group of people to tell me what words come into mind in relation to 'mental health', their responses are about mental ill-health! It's as if the term has been hi-jacked to become totally problem-focused.
In the meantime, we're experiencing an epidemic of mental ill-health. About 1 in 4 people are experiencing some form of common mental health problem such as depression, anxiety and various stress related symptoms. GP surgeries are overwhelmed with such problems, mental health services are only able to provide support for the 1% of the population with much more severe mental health difficulties, and there's a plethora of largely unregulated services, treatments and remedies out on the private market. A recent research study showed that the majority of long term sickness absence from work resulted from stress related conditions.
The trouble with focusing on the problems and the pain, is that that's what we become experts in. We're looking for cures and treatments to fix the problem, instead of focusing on what makes for good mental health. We know that physical health is multi-dimensional - no-one imagines that pumping iron to build your muscles is a recipe for overall physical health, although it will certainly make you stronger for certain activities.
So what are the essentials of good mental health?
Connection is certainly one of the best known. Having positive close relationships is good for our mental health, as is having a wider network of friends, colleagues and acquaintances which will vary over time. Giving to others is another really important aspect of connection, improving our sense of self worth and wellbeing.
Challenge is about learning and development, it's how we grow. For children, everyday brings new challenges, yet as adults we often become increasingly fearful of change, unwilling to learn new skills or put ourselves in unfamiliar situations. So expanding our comfort zone, sometimes in small ways if we're feeling particularly vulnerable, will help develop our self-confidence and sense of personal achievement.
Composure means a sense of balance, and ability to distance ourselves from our thoughts and emotions. It means our ability to respond rather than react. This could be described as our sense of spiritual connection, which may come through a particular belief or faith, or may be found through connection with nature. A mentally healthy person will feel an inner strength of spirit, and find ways to support that.
Character relates to the way in which we interpret our experiences and our responses to them. We all have our own personal story, or stories, which we may or may not tell others. We may cast ourselves as the hero, the victim or the villain, and however we do this will impact generally on our mental health. Someone who has experienced severe life trauma may have great difficulty piecing together their story at all, leaving them feeling literally fragmented. Good mental health means having a strong sense of personal values, awareness of our own strengths, skills and resources, and personal stories of learning from mistakes, survival, success and appreciation.
Creativity represents the fun, childlike aspects of our mental health. As children we are naturally creative and we play. As we grow into adulthood, our creativity and playfulness is often discouraged or devalued, and this can cause great frustration, literally diminishing the capacity of our brain to function as well as it could. Exploring creative activities has often been found to have a powerful therapeutic effect, and good mental health certainly depends in part on opportunities to bring fun, playfulness and creativity into our lives.
These 5 C's of good mental health offer a framework within which we can think about our mental health in the same way as we might our physical health. It's pretty damned hard to be a perfect specimen of physical health,but then who needs to be perfect? Just like our physical health, our mental health is a work in progress and always will be.
In years gone by, many people with physical illnesses were treated cruelly because of ignorance and shame. I recall when cancer was spoken in hushed whispers as the Big C. Nowadays mental ill-health is the 'elephant in the room' which we need to be looking at long and hard, exposing to practical common sense and intelligent discussion.
World Mental Health Day on October 10 has been a timely reminder that good mental health really is something we can aspire to for everyone. Let's make it so!

Carolyn Barber, BSc (Hons), CQSW, is the founder of Way-finder Associates, a social care training and consultancy business specializing in team development, independent supervision and staff well being. As a serial social entrepreneur, Carolyn has developed community based programs to promote understanding of mental well being using positive solution focused approaches.
Carolyn has over 30 years experience in social care as practitioner, trainer, researcher and manager, working across public, voluntary and independent sectors.
GSCC registration no: 1074227
LinkedIn profile: http://uk.linkedin.com/in/carolynbarber
For more information about Take Five wellbeing resources and programmes, go to http://www.meetrelaxlearncreate.co.uk