A key aspect of the teenage years is for the individual to
develop self-identity and this is done within the context of the social
environment. Social interaction and the development of effective social
skills become fundamental during this stage of life, and thus most teens
become preoccupied with achieving social acceptability.
This is why peer influence is so powerful in the teen years. All teenagers are influencers in their own right whether they realize it or not, but conversely all teenagers are susceptible to influence from others. Unfortunately, the reality is that not all peers are a source of positive influence. For instance peers may influence each other to experiment with drugs or alcohol, or teens may feel it is expected of them to have sex by a certain age whether they are ready or not. When a teenager feels compelled to do something or behave in a certain way that makes them feel uncomfortable or that they do not agree with because they perceive it to be an expectation of their peers; that is when peer influence becomes peer pressure.
Peer pressure can be both positive and negative. Every parent blames peer pressure when their own child makes choices they disapprove of, but it is important to ask yourself if whether your own child is being influenced or if he or she is the one doing the influencing. It is equally important that you instil in your teen the values and strength of character to make good choices as it is to ensure that your child befriends those who hold similar values.
However even when a circle of friends are a relatively level-headed group, in the teen years, 'peers' extend beyond those we have close relationships with and extends to all other teens they come into contact with in their primary social environments such as schools and malls. Those teens that have low self-esteem and doubt their choices and decisions are more prone to cave to peer pressure. The key is to equip your child to be able to identify negative peer pressure from positive peer influence; the key phrase being 'pressure'. Develop in your teen the ability to:
· Be comfortable and secure in the choices they make even if their peers question or taunt them about it
· Talk to you about choices and temptations. Have a non-judgmental attitude when talking about difficult life issues such as sex. Brainstorm and discuss with your teen action plans and scenarios where peer pressure may put him or her in an awkward social position.
· Take responsibility for the choices they make. As much as peer pressure may influence your teen to make poor choices, the final decision to comply with that pressure ultimately lies with your teen. By understanding your teen's position, yet still holding them accountable for mistakes or errors in judgment you will be preparing them for inevitable difficult choices later in life.
Teenage Depression
This is why peer influence is so powerful in the teen years. All teenagers are influencers in their own right whether they realize it or not, but conversely all teenagers are susceptible to influence from others. Unfortunately, the reality is that not all peers are a source of positive influence. For instance peers may influence each other to experiment with drugs or alcohol, or teens may feel it is expected of them to have sex by a certain age whether they are ready or not. When a teenager feels compelled to do something or behave in a certain way that makes them feel uncomfortable or that they do not agree with because they perceive it to be an expectation of their peers; that is when peer influence becomes peer pressure.
Peer pressure can be both positive and negative. Every parent blames peer pressure when their own child makes choices they disapprove of, but it is important to ask yourself if whether your own child is being influenced or if he or she is the one doing the influencing. It is equally important that you instil in your teen the values and strength of character to make good choices as it is to ensure that your child befriends those who hold similar values.
However even when a circle of friends are a relatively level-headed group, in the teen years, 'peers' extend beyond those we have close relationships with and extends to all other teens they come into contact with in their primary social environments such as schools and malls. Those teens that have low self-esteem and doubt their choices and decisions are more prone to cave to peer pressure. The key is to equip your child to be able to identify negative peer pressure from positive peer influence; the key phrase being 'pressure'. Develop in your teen the ability to:
· Be comfortable and secure in the choices they make even if their peers question or taunt them about it
· Talk to you about choices and temptations. Have a non-judgmental attitude when talking about difficult life issues such as sex. Brainstorm and discuss with your teen action plans and scenarios where peer pressure may put him or her in an awkward social position.
· Take responsibility for the choices they make. As much as peer pressure may influence your teen to make poor choices, the final decision to comply with that pressure ultimately lies with your teen. By understanding your teen's position, yet still holding them accountable for mistakes or errors in judgment you will be preparing them for inevitable difficult choices later in life.
Teenage Depression
The must read book: "All you wanted to know about Teen
Depression", is available at: [http://www.depression-teenage.com]. Anne
Ross is a Psychotherapist, Counsellor, Crises facilitator, Cranial
Sacral and Myofascial Therapist, including various other
Massage/Body/Energy techniques, but above all she is a mother. She is an
accredited member of the Traditional-Medicine Society and the
Association of Transactional Analysis.
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